Ever notice how it's the little things in life that amuse us so much? More to the point, ever notice how it's the silly little idiocies in life that amuse us more than anything else? Well, this is not as much ''the little blog that could'' as it is ''the blog that enjoys going up the down escalator in your local mall.'' Will it have anything of real importance? No, probably not. But enjoy the ride never the less!

 


So…

There was this Con, you see, and it was filled with otaku (some of whom had not exactly showered for, I’d say, at least two days prior to their arrival), and we spent way too much money on swag we saw in the dealer’s room.

That’s the really, really abbreviated version of it. The longer, snooze-inducing version goes a little like this:



You ever notice how shit seems to start flying at random fans in the room just as you’re about to kiss your workplace good-bye for 4 solid days? I started out the day with barely a care in the world, safe in the knowledge that I was working a shorter shift and would soon be gone at something I’d spent the last 12 months looking forward to. After all, in a shift that’s barely even 7 hours long, what could possibly go wrong?

It’s that sort of thinking that gets you in trouble. Notably when the last 2 hours are upon you, and suddenly you are deluged with problem customers with problematic requests/searches for me to look into, problem customers with problem luggage repairs, and problem customers just asking to be taken out by our ‘Customer Appreciation Crowbar’ and stuffed into a 32” suitcase until we find a better means of disposing of their now problematic corpse.

Half of what I had to contend with that particular afternoon was fortuitously remedied on the spot (thank you, Power of Manager) or could be set aside until my return. Work always has to get its last hateful licks in, doesn’t it?

But in the end, I managed to sneak out of the store just as a crush of unexpected customers came storming in. One uneventful busride later (the eventful one was due to appear only after the Con, as many of you know from the previous entry), and Mel & I were throwing our luggage into the car, reassuring the cat that we really did love him and people would be stopping by to visit him in our absence, and shuffling off to Brantford.

We spent the evening relaxing with Kevin & Dana, making final plans for driving, room arrangements and the like. Sleep came surprisingly early for all of us, which brings us to…



I’d like to think the reason we were all awake and alert so unusually early was because, gosh darn it, we’re that sort of group of go-getters. But it was probably the latent paranoia we all held in possibly being late for the Con (and getting caught in the weekend Toronto traffic) that made us all perk up by 8am.

In a most peculiar twist, we had all packed the night before and were subsequently left wondering what the hell to do with ourselves for the morning. Kevin and his brother Charlie (aka, our van driver) skipped off to nab the last of the perishable foods, and before we knew what the hell had happened, we shot through Toronto and ended up at the Doubletree Hotel just after noon.

However, we were half an hour late in witnessing Con-goers breaking 2 elevators almost simultaneously. I think that’s a new record now, isn’t it: two elevators killed before the Con even starts? But I digress.

Happiness is an early check-in. Of equal happiness is having a rolling dolly cart to ensure we didn’t destroy our backs as we hauled our bags and coolers up to our room. And in a very déjà vu moment, we ended up with the exact same room as last Con: the 4th floor corner suite overlooking the convention centre, with a king-sized bed. I think this is by far the best room in the hotel; you’re far away enough to watch all the Con-goers and Cosplayers move around, but not so high up that they’re specks of colours.

With three hours left before we could really do much of anything Con-related, we wondered what to do with ourselves. Sadly, the hotel decided to help keep us occupied by telling us that we had to go back downstairs to sign a form about having a pet in the room. Bear in mind: earlier, we walked up to the check-in desk with Shady in my arms. The employee there smiled and mentioned how cute Shady was, and made sure to hand us the “pet” form to sign.

And yet some yazoo called up to our room insisting we had not signed the form and must go downstairs. In a fun twist, guess which desk attendant we ended up in front of again? She performed a double-take upon seeing us back so soon, and was downright boggled when we informed her of the phone call. Her exact words: “But you did fill out the form! I gave it to you myself. Here’s the form right here in your file folder! What the hell are they thinking?!”

^-^ I would have offered her my complimentary room cookie for the awesomeness she displayed, but those were really good cookies. (I nommed mine within 20 minutes of settling into our hotel room.)

Back up in the safety of our room, we all scattered to the four proverbial winds: Kevin & Dana had to help set up the Dragonstar booth in the dealer’s room, Charlie had to get registered, and Mel & I had to get our panelist badges. Shady was left with her toys and bribes--er, snacks; I think she just sulked whenever we weren't around. Fear not, though, faithful readers. This makes the third Con she’s attended, and while she gets little jumpy at the large crowds by the second day, Shady has resigned herself to the fact that we’re gone for about 2-3 hours at a time. She’s always ecstatic to see us whenever we return, but whenever we go she just gets a grumpy look on her face and settles down in a corner as if to say, “Fine. Go then. Leave me alone. See if I care. *sniffle* I thought you loved me….”

But she was spoiled rotten whenever we were around, and we tried to be around as much as possible, so all was decent. At least I hope it was. As far as I can tell, she didn’t pee on any of our clothes in vengeful retaliation, so that has to count for something, yes?

Anyhoo…

All too quickly, AN09 began. Huzzah! To the dealer’s room! For swag and glory!

But first: a panel.

This makes it, what? The second year in a row I opened the Con by being on a panel? *shrug* Oh well, having not a lot in terms of a swag Wish-List, I didn’t mind. The Fushigi Yugi panel, despite the number of panelists rivaling the number of attendees for the first half, was very enjoyable and interactive. We started out with a panel table and an additionally strange, slender table running down the aisle between the two sections of chairs.

I cheerfully informed all the fans coming for the FY panel that we were going to have an audience participation moment and perform a human sacrifice to appease the dark gods of anime, but first we needed a volunteer from the crowd! Funny…no one volunteered.

Once the panel ended, Mel & I hit the dealer’s room and artist’s alley. After last year’s debacle wherein I discovered all the cool artists’ works on the last day of the Con (when I thusly had no money to buy anything), I made sure to do a sweep of the alley and dealer’s room beforehand. Manga was purchased. DVD box sets were also purchased. Artwork was purchased. And most of the DVD titles with the highest priorities on my wishlist were not found at all. Can’t say that was surprising, since I’m now gunning for older series that are either endangered or out of print, like the last 2 arcs of Utena, the Project Ako box (now on Ebay for the low, low price of $180!) and Shamanic Princess (now acquired at an actually low, low price thanks to Mel’s impressive Google-fu).

At Dragonstar, I found myself sorely tempted by the mere title of a cheesy, live-action Japanese movie: Attack Girls’ Swim Team vs. The Undead. I mean, come on! What’s not enticing about something so straightforward? It’s got girls on swim teams. And zombies! What could possibly go wrong with that combination?

(The answer, to be further detailed in the next blog entry after this, can be found with four simple words: heat-seeking vagina laser. I am dead serious. I couldn’t make this sort of bizarre shit up even if I tried. And believe me, I’ve tried.)

We were tempted to go to the Nomunichi (garage sale) at the Renaissance Hotel, but in the end opted to hang out in our hotel room with Shady. Crash time came soon after Kevin & Dana returned from their booth-running.




One bad thing about a busy day at a Con: the next day, an early rise & shine is about as welcome as a plague monkey dressed in a tutu and foaming at the mouth. Alas, I had that, starting with a 10am panel. Luckily, it was Writer’s Block along with Nightbreak and Steve Savage (plus a few fun others), and all in all it went quite well. There were a surprisingly large amount of otaku conscious and attending the panel, and somewhere in there we managed to toss out random ideas for a story…and ended up with the basic plot of Code Geass.

Um…great minds think alike when throwing out random plot devices?

More dealer’s room visitations were made (and the Swim Team Vs. Undead DVD was purchased despite Mel threatening me with the usual things: death, dismemberment, forcing me to watch the SM dub), but I soon had to duck out for Steve Savage’s “Fan to Pro” panel. I quite enjoyed it, as Steve knows what he’s talking about and it did help with that slight kick in the ass to get a move on with my own writing projects.

Immediately following that was the Fanfiction panel, where I had another déjà vu flash as I saw Mel, Nightbreak & Dejana paneling with me. It’s always great when you know the quirks of your fellow panelists and can play off each other. Much fun was had. ^-^

Afterwards, there was an impromptu photo session wherein Dejana (dressed as Sailor Pluto) and two fellow dotmooners (Shel, dressed as Sailor Saturn, and Kasey, dressed as Princess Serenity) did a series of pictures wherein I did unsavory things to the Silence Glaive and Timestaff…and they retaliated in kind.

Apparently people having no idea of the jokes behind this (hey, this is Chaos getting up to no good as usual, after all!) still loved the idea of some random otaku getting his ass kicked by Sailor Senshi. We had a small cluster of photographers by the end. Hoorays for my stage-hamming!

The afternoon was a blur of pee breaks for Shady, lunches and more swag. Mel batted her eyes at me and asked for a set of shuriken knives for Christmas. All I could picture was said knives ending up sticking out of my butt during the culmination of some future argument between us. So no, there were no bladed weapons for my saucy wench this year. Again. (This makes it her fifth failed “eyelash-batting” attempt.)

Mel had her “Best & Worst of Anime” panel, and the turn-out for that was out-the-door packed. This situation was the complete opposite from last year, where it was an early Sunday morning timeslot and next to no one showed up. Sometimes it really is all in the timing.

And all this led us to the 10pm “Fic Fic Boom”, wherein Steve, Gaffney, Nightbreak and myself all tried to break the audience by offering horrible ideas and advice for fanfics. As a gag, we also brought handouts and a canister of cyanide (Mmm….almond-flavoured Mike and Ike’s).

Alas, I ended up being the first to use a pill. (Thanks, Sean.)

And if we thought the audience laughed loudly when my head clunked onto the table in feigning death the first time around, that was nothing compared to when Gaffney broke the rest of us on the panel. (I think it had something to do with Lucky Star coprophilia. Those of you daring to perform Google Seppuku, start your search engines now!) Nightbreak, Steve and I all took a pill and dropped dead in unison. Whereupon Gaffney leapt from his chair and performed a victory dance down the aisle.

If only we’d had a camera for that. I don’t think we’ll be able to top the sheer spontaneous awesome of that moment.

And with that panel over, it was back up to the room to relax with a few friends before leaping off to the JPop Dance. The dance was amazing. The security at the door was astounding…and sadly needed, as they caught more than a few people with some rather illicit substances and/or weapons. I heard of at least one person getting nailed with drugs. Now how in the hell do you honestly deluded yourself into thinking you can evade three separate and distinct security checkpoints? Dumbass.

On the other hand, while waiting in the line, we did get the rare treat of seeing some strange little otaku sitting on the gravel behind us. He must have been on something (my bets are some very prime ganja), because he was staring at the gravel like it was the most incredible thing in the universe. Nothing could shake his rapt fascination as he scooped up little bits of gravel in his hands and let them pour back out onto the ground. But this was not enough for him to contemplate, oh no; he quickly shuffled off and returned with one really big rock, which he set down in front of him and began pouring more gravel onto it. Then he pitched over sideways and remained in a statuesque position.

I’m assuming someone fetched him or wheeled him off, as he was no longer there when I left the JPop dance later on. And courtesy of Diana, here’s a picture of me with my new favourite OTP: Rock-Guy & gravel. (Though I have yet to decide who’s the uke. You may debate this amongst yourselves.)






As it always has been, the JPop dance was in full swing, with spontaneously-generated conga lines and more glowsticks than you could shake a Crossplayer at. (And there were a lot of those too, sadly and most notably the guy with the chin stubble and 3 different variations of Sailor Saturn costumes--Princess Saturn, Sailor Saturn and Super Sailor Saturn--he liked to alternate throughout the Con. Gyaaaaa….) I bounced between hanging out with Roupen at the DJ’s booth and dancing like only a white boy can on the dance floor.

Upon realizing that Yatta had yet to be played, I made sure to stick around to enjoy that. And would you believe it? Over half the people dancing had absolutely no idea how to dance to Yatta. Are we that old, or are they just that out of touch with old school cool?

Damn newbies…get the hell off’a my lawn until you can dance with white undies and a green leaf girding your loins!

Shortly after Yatta, Mel & I retired to our room and crashed.




The day had to be met earlier than any of us would have liked, but at least for Mel & I there was nothing imperative to do until our 1pm Yuu Watase panel. We made sure to check out the dealer’s room for any last-day deals, but as there was very little catching our interest in the first place, we didn’t nab too much. Though Kevin did brandish a thoroughly discounted Sorcerer Hunters box in front of me, and Mel graciously agreed to front the money for it so long as I paid her back. Which I shall soon enough.

The Watase panel was very well-attended, with a number of the FY crowd returning to see us. (It helps to pimp out future panels when you’re on other, earlier ones. Huzzah for Machiavellian strategy!) And this time around, Mel managed to break some of the younger Watase fans out there by simply reporting how Watase’s newest manga is going to be a yaoi-oriented one.

One last visit to the dealer’s room was made, and then it was off to the Sailor Moon panel. And wow, was it packed. I was honestly surprised, since it was one of the last panels of the Con and I’d have thought most otaku would be either raking in one final purchase at the Dealer’s Room or have already left the hotel. But the audience was lively and I’d like to think everyone had a great time.

If only they’d known I moderated that panel the entire time without pants…

No, just kidding. The pants were on for the entirety of the Con this time.

Once that panel ended, the Con was more or less over. Mel & I met up with Gary, Matt, Jen and Charlie, and we stopped by at the Ginko’s restaurant for our post-Con dinner. We’d done this last year, and the quiet dinner had the surprising effect of totally relaxing us. Hence the reason Mel & I were keen to do it this year, especially trying out their teppan-yaki table this time; we went so far as to setting aside $100 of our Con money specifically for the Sunday night Ginko’s dinner.

The real treat was seeing Charlie sit down for a Japanese dinner for the first time. The rest of us having experienced teppan-yaki before, we all waited with a smirk for the fireball. Not surprisingly, Charlie recoiled. He did better than me; the first time I got to witness the entertaining fireball o’ vegetables, I nearly leapt right out of my chair in surprise. Overall, Charlie quite liked the meal and the experience. Another convert! The flaming vegetables be praised!

Naturally, with all this over it was time for the traditional swim and room party. Mel, myself, Matt, Jen and Nightbreak headed down to the Jacuzzi. Soon we were visited by Roupen, Chris and Jason (some of whom were enjoying a second post-Con swim to make up for the whole damn pool being closed last year).

The room party was loud and lively, with most of the gang assembled together to laugh, drink Sake and do the usual multiple conversations. Threaded through the party (and part of the earlier afternoon) I made a few contributions to a deranged round-robin fanfic being headed up by Dejana. When I last saw it, the story had thus far involved a smoking Princess Serenity, robots, zombie Serenity (not to be confused with smoking Serenity), ninjas and pirates. “And that’s when the time-traveling Nazis attacked.”

^-^ I am so going to get my ass kicked by whomever was next, considering that part about the Nazis was the last line of my final contribution.

Switching back to the party, with one final toast, we celebrated an Anime North that had managed to go off without any notable problems or fuck-ups. This was a very happy thing, considering last year’s issues with drugs and the seriously ill-advised parking lot bonfire.

Naturally, we’re all terrified to see what next year’s karmic balance will bring.

Towards the end of the shindig, Mel & I volunteered to wait with Jen outside for her bus. Which was great and all…had the bus not been 20 minutes late on top of already being 20 minutes late. With an unpleasantly cold wind blowing, all of us waiting for the bus ended up huddling in the hotel’s side entrance while one brave/foolhardy man sat out in the cold as look-out. We chatted with Jen until the look-out suddenly began signaling to us. A bus was finally coming! Huzzah!

Alas, by the time Mel & I returned upstairs, the party had disbanded. But that was all right, as sleep was good….




Hello, Monday morning! Now kiss my ass as I roll back over in my nice warm bed. That particular sentiment couldn’t stay too long, though, as we needed to rouse ourselves for the post-Con morning breakfast at Perkins, also fast becoming a fancrew tradition. The service was surprisingly swift, causing us to wonder if Perkins had been decimated by Con crowds over the weekend. I can only imagine what Kelsey’s, Swiss Chalet and Subway were like over those few days…let alone Harveys, who had a moderately long but never shortening line for their Free Burger Sunday. (Poor sots.)

After a round of good-byes, we returned to our room, packed up and made the drive back to Brantford. Mel & I floated around with Kevin & Dana for the remainder of the day, unwinding a little bit more before heading home. Wherein I dreaded Tuesday’s return to work.

Our poor Chance refused to leave our sides the second we returned. I woke up twice in the middle of the night to find the cat snuggled right up next to me. He hardly ever snuggles us in bed unless it’s a particularly cold winter night...in which case, Shady’s right next to him and the both of the little fuzzbutts have somehow managed to commandeer over half the bed.




The store was clean when I walked in. And intact. I must confess to being mildly disappointed.

Thanks to a heap of unexpected mark-downs, I spent the next two days catching up on paperwork, as well as cleaning and tweaking the store until it sparkled to my usual satisfaction. (But not in a vampirey disco ball kind of way.)




So…there was this Con. And it was filled with otaku, and swag was purchased, and I had an absolute blast being there for it. I’m already looking forward to next year’s Anime North, especially since we’ve got a plan for the new Confic, and doubly especially since it will hopefully involve puppets.

That’s all for now.

Tune in next time, when I will give you the 10-minute summary of Attack Girls’ Swim Team Vs. The Undead!!!!onesies!!1!




Today’s Lesson: you are not David Bowie/Jareth the Goblin King. I don’t care if Cosplaying as The Riddler at AN09 was your lifelong dream come true; I didn’t need to see your green spandex crotch bulge of doom, and quite frankly, Jareth-Bowie’s was so much better than yours.

Labels: Anime North 2009 Con report

posted by Phillip at 5:18 PM